They are NEVER “Asking For It”

Posted: September 12, 2014 in Blog

One of the best things about working at a Spirit Halloween store is having groups of people come in, not knowing what they want. Because then I get to have fun, tossing costume bits at them and giving them advice about what they should wear and what looks good and what does not. Seriously, it’s so much fun! But what disheartens me is when I have girls trying on outfits, and then one of them tells their friend “you are so getting raped in that.”

Yeah, that has happened. And recently too. As in last night.

When people say things like that, be it a guy or a girl it not only makes me sad but it really angers me. Nobody (no matter what gender you identify with) should ever have to worry about being assaulted or raped for any reason, let along just because of what you are wearing. That statement alone we as a society have heard over a million times and yet it never seems to register with most people. Just because someone is dressed a certain way does NOT give anybody the right to assault them. That person is not “asking for it.” You know, a lot of people who slut shame and are perpetrators of rape culture say things like “What are we animals?” “She’s looks like a rabbit in heat!” or other analogous phrases comparing individuals who think it’s fine for people to go out dressed in revealing clothes to animals. Actually feminism, and thinking it is okay to be yourself and dress in whatever way makes you feel comfortable, is more “human” than what those people are saying. By allowing rape culture to exist you yourself are saying we are no better than animals. You are saying that “hey that is a piece of meat, and I want it.” You are saying that you yourself are just an animal and not a human being.

I’m also equally as heartbroken whenever I have heavier set people come in looking for costumes and thinking that nothing will look good on them. Be proud of your body! It’s yours, and nobody can take that away from you. I will say that a lot of our packaging at Spirit appeals to a certain body type, which is unfortunate, but please don’t let that deter you from at least trying something on!

All of that being said, people (and I hate to single out a gender but it is mostly females)- do not dress in what you think someone else wants you to dress in. Dress to please yourself. Wear what makes you feel happy in. If that means wearing skin tight spandex firefighter lady suit, so be it. If that means wearing a zombie prom queen outfit, that’s fine too! Whatever you want! Don’t feel like you have to wear something just to please another person. Be yourself. That’s the great thing about Halloween, you can be yourself- screw everyone else. I wish every day was like Halloween.

I know this was a tad jumbled and a bit rambly at parts- but I mean every bit of it. Grow up people, and move past the whole “well, she’s asking for it,” because NO. NO, NO, NO, NO. NO SHE/HE/THEY ARE NOT NOW, NOT EVER. NO. No matter what they is wearing, no matter how they is acting! Nobody ever is asking to be assaulted like that. And as a friend, you shouldn’t tell someone you love that they’re asking for it either.

I love Halloween, and I want everyone to enjoy it as much as I do.  So don’t ruin it for someone else; don’t be a perpetrator of a crime, like assault. Stop, and think about your actions. They have consequences.


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